Ok, so here I am posting after all of this time. I have made some tough decisions, after months of just feeling really unsettled about my adoption in Kazakhstan. I have decided to terminate the adoption process in Kaz. It is so hard....after all the hours I have spent. I am very disappointed and sad. I just do not have a good feeling about it any longer. I am scared about the time I could possibly have to spend away from work and am terrified of the cost of Kazakhstan adoptions and travel right now. It just seems to be getting more and more uncertain and expensive. I do not want to get near the end and have a blip that could cause me to not be able to finish. This has been weighing heavily on my heart.
There is also different news to report. I have decided to follow my heart and apply to Ethiopia. I have always felt called to adopt. I feel that the greatest need is in Ethiopia. I just swell with energy and love for the nation and their terrible struggles. There are between 4-5 milliion orphans in this country and this is just a staggering number.
Many people I speak with do not understand why I want to adopt. This is simple. I have thought about doing this since 3rd grade. I want more children. There are children without clothes, food, family......and I have the space :) Pretty simple.
It's a big commitment...and sure I am terrified in some ways, but my heart leads, and with prayer....I must follow. Travel, money, and freedom don't mean a thing if you have not followed your heart.
2 years ago
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I am so excited about your decision to adopt from Ethiopia. It is what you have always wanted. I want to travel with you when you go...I will be the photojournalist. Maybe one day your little girl will have a cousin who shares her Ethiopian heritage:). I am so proud of how brave and strong you are. I love you. In Him, Ash
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